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Story Time in the Office of the Chronicler

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  • Story Time in the Office of the Chronicler

    Fifth day of the Tenth Moon,
    Nineteenth Year of Recent Awakenings

    In accordance with the will of Her Majesty and in upholding the duties charged to me as Junior Chronicler, I hereby submit the account of
    Story Time in the Office of the Chronicler.

    It appears Her Majesty has ordered the Necromancer to raise some tellers of tales as those present in the Clocktower discovered last night.

    Various residents were gathered at the Open Chronicler Bell and were enjoyably entertained as a Newly Awakened entered and presented a story. Ser Bombur delivered the tale of Captain Chip and the Demon as transcribed below. This chronicler has attempted to reproduce the accent of the story-teller.

    The Story of Captain Chip and the Demon

    Once ther were a lad named Chip. No other name bu' Chip were 'is fer that's what he were called!

    So Chip ran away from home cause Chip were a roight [expletive deleted] as a kid so he regularly received a bruisin' from his father a'leas' twoice a week! And when ya run away from home, ya become a sailor, roight? Roight! So Chip become a sailor and he climbed the ranks real quick-like, ya see? Before ya knew it, he were Firs' mate. But Chip were gettin' impatient cause the Captain owned the boat an' he weren't likely dyin' anytime soon.

    So Chip, bein' the same petulan' little [expletive deleted] he were always, got righ' impatient an when they docked, 'e went deep in the swamps to contract the help of a Witch! [Here ser Bombur poked his eye with his finger.] She had one eye --ouch!-- an' warts an' saggy cold ole witch [body part]! Witches got cold [body part]. E'eryone knows.

    So, he went to this filthy ole hag an' asked to make a deal so 'e could be Captain. The Witch told 'im the only way was to make a deal with a demon but he'd have to get her wha' she wanted firs' an' that was the heart of an innocen’.

    So, Chip, bein' a right [expletive deleted] but never havin' the courage to really kill no one, goes an hunts a wild boar, takes the boar's heart, ties it in a sack an' brings her that. She didn't check that close and needed it fer somethin' different, so she didn't notice. Fer now. So with a big poof an' a boom, she puts Chip in touch with a Demon! Through a puff of smoke he sees it and they speak like through a window.

    Yeeee. The Demon says, "I'll get rid of your Captain and make sure you get his ship, but in 20 years, you and the ship be mine! I'll meet you at dead man's harbor in 20 years!" And Chip signed his name in blood! He had to slice open his thumb and write Chip on a contract written on human flesh. It was tanned. So Chip signed an' the next day, Captain had an entire shipin' crate dropped on 'im. Flat dead in a blink.

    Aye, an' they found 'is will an' Chip were made Captain o' the Shield Maiden. But Chip were a [deleted] an' he decided instead o tradin', they'd all become pirates! Fer twenty odd years they went merodin' cross the seas, stealin' an' killin' an' jus' beein' roight [expletive deleted].

    Chip had fergotten his bargain an' went on an' on til one night he were in his quarters an' the mirror cracked an' a familiar voice hissed from the other side, "Dead Man's Coooove."

    Chip were not ready to give up now, he were Captain Chip! No one catches Captain Chip!

    They got as far away from Dead Man's Cove as they could. Sailin' in the opposite direction fer nearly three weeks! Then strange things started happenin'. Screams in the night, crew goin' missin', whispers in the dark. One day, Chip wake up an' those that were left were dead, no sign of other life nowhere but his in the middle o' the sea. Then Chip spot an island. It looked familiar, so he went up to the lookin' glass to see what he coul' see.

    Dead Man's Cove! An' who ya think were standin' on the shore? The demon! Aye, tha' ole demon were waitin' there on the shores, out in the open and Chip gave no thought, he quickly got to turnin' that ship right around.

    Yep yep, so Chip sailed away after lots o' work, deep into the ocean. The nex' mornin', he saw an island...looked real familiar. Dead Man's Cove. Demon.

    He goes to turn the ship around again… Bu' the Witch were waitin' fer him at the wheel.

    An' that were the last of ole Captain Chip.

    The End

    The Office of the Chronicle is located in the Clock Tower above the Outer Bailey courtyard. Open bells are held each Thor’s evening at seven late bells.

    This chronicle will be subject to changes and corrections, as I humbly ask all readers please indicate to me through discretion any falsehoods I may have mistakenly communicated. It is by means of the conservation of the Past that we continue to serve Her Majesty and give substance to those that follow.

    In service to Her Majesty Queen Vivienne, The Office of the Chronicler, and the Denizenry of Her Majesty's Realm.

    Sera Tine
    Junior Chronicler

    Senior Chronicler
    Secretary to Lord Dolph Li'astri